Expanding the edges
I recently bought myself a singing bowl. I'd wanted one for some time now and not only couldn't I make them sing, I hadn't seen one that spoke to me in any way. You know what I mean.
I bought this bowl in India in Mcleod Ganj, the home of the Dalai Lama, and it's now one of my precious things. It sounds hypnotic, deep, the vibrations of the bowl, surprising. When I play it, I remember India and imagine monks chanting. I love it. And yet I almost didn't go to India.
When a friend asked me if I'd be going on a yoga retreat in India that she knew about, I said No. In fact, it was more Never! No! (and that's really my clean version). I was surprised at the depth of my response, it was visceral. Uppermost I was concerned about getting sick. The kind you hear about, unknown illness, vomiting, months and months of being unwell, perhaps never the same afterward. I knew other yoga teachers who said they couldn't quite get up the courage to venture back after being sick there before.
I also found fear came up for me about travelling alone, and by alone I meant without my husband Paul. This was a surprising one. Where did this come from? So much consuming fear about the idea of going.
Then I thought - if not now, when and I said yes. I didn't want my fear to be the limiting decider for me. I didn't like the feelings that came up and I felt I needed to rock this boat.
Well, I went. And I had an amazing time. A hard trip at times but I discovered that I'm actually very level headed, resourceful, ok in stressful situations and I trust that it'll be ok. The people of India are beautiful, the food is awesome, the culture shock is actually a thing but it's ok. And most surprising, I can see myself going back. No one guessed that one.
So my thought for this blog is the surprising changes that can come from stepping into something fearful. That ol' chestnut of feeling the fear and doing it anyway. I'm not the same person I was before I went to India. I actually think my cells are still reverberating with the energy of the place. The challenge has expanded me in some wonderful ways I'm loving right now.
I'd love to hear what challenges you've stepped into and what happened out of that. Bring it on, I say!
Happy journeys x